The Book of Ashes

Reminicsing... 7:27AM

Another day, another lesson learned. It appears we never stop learning, but will always think we've got it sussed. Its been awhile and for that I'm sorry. I've managed to install some dodgey software which is currently locking down my internet after a few minutes. Probably because I have a cracked version. A lot has happened and I'm no longer in that time to tell it. We won our final game of indoor soccer. The One Team is now dominant (over the 5th of 5 grades). Maybe this year we will go up. I have reached a goal in my savings. It was that time, reward time and so I decided I was going to go out and buy all those items of clothing that I needed. I realised at this point that I work quite differently from most people (girls). Instead of browsing the shops then seeing something you like and working out that you can fit it into your budget and ending up with heaps of clothes (but always feeling like you don't have enough), I allocate myself 1 item to buy per month. Then with that money allocated I go looking for the express purpose of finding something I need. It works well, I generally wait for sales (save up my items then buy a few at once) and have increased my wardrobe considerably since the early days. Now I had the opposite, $400 to spend on what ever, so I went out to dressmart and surprising found the money gone very quickly. It was exilerating, exactly like how I imagine it would be for the wife of a rich businessman going out and raking up thousands of dollars worth of debt on it. I wanted more. And I will get more because I am not done yet. But I am too in control. I feel the money bleed away from me like, well blood does from an open wound. One day I will have unlimited money to spend and then the mallrat in me will be free...

I need to run again. It is a desire in me matched only by my laziness in actually doing it. I want that feeling of power again, of running up Mt Vic and feeling like God would have a hard time keeping this pace. I think the adreneline and endorphines have a bit to do with that feeling but I'm all for it.

This weekend is going to be a good one. Dan drives down tomorrow from Auckland with Katrina. Bev has a new job and he has coincided his farewell with Dan's stay and another workmates plans so this Friday is reputed to be a large night. I look forward to it indeed and shall bring along the trusted camera. I should probably name my camera. It is definitely worthy of a name, like a car or a boat. Funny that people don't name houses, even though they are like a car, something you can get inside and be sheltered in. I wouldn't name my car though. Its a Nissan Bluebird, no personality, a hundred others like it in this city of ours. A name reflects personality. If I had to give it a name it would be Constant Financal Burden. Ha! Its not really but that seems its most outstanding feature. It costs, especially since the petrol keeps going up and up.

So I've written all this but now I can't actually post it. Will do it later and you won't even no the difference.

Did I mention what I brought at dressmart? A new pair of cool shoes, a black coat (like suits wear over their suit on cold days) and some running shorts. The reason I thought I needed stuff was because I have one coat, a raincoat, I wear it everyday to work and now its getting scummy. Bonnie on the other hand has at least 4 coats, one full length one for warmth, a water proof one, a short raincoat like a ski jacket, well heaps and all for different purposes and it looks good too. I just have one, now two. I intend to have more clothes, after all the garments we fashion ourselves in define us.

I'm out of inspiration. Bonnie and I are going down to Queenstown next week to visit dad and get some skiing in. Should be fun. I definitely need a break.